Stretched beyond driven

Ever get those times when you feel like you have been going at it for a little bit too long? I've realized that if I don't allow myself a day off or a long break faster working continuously for 10 days, I start to lose focus, motivation and the drive. From what I can tell, even though I'm 2 days late for my entry (which explains how busy I've been!), I'm not feeling it today. I didn't sleep well, I haven't got that great appetite I usually have, I'm not looking forward to achieving anything today. Yet I'm in a bind because I know I have stuff that must get done today or at least asap.

How do you normally solve these moments? It's worse since I'm even alone here so I don't have the "energy bounced off from hard working colleagues" to rely on or "you'll work hard when the boss is watching" happen. All I have is my to-do list to constantly remind me of all the 953058258302 things (or at least that's how it feels like) I have outstanding.

I guess it all started when I'd been so tied up (been doing back-to-back comedy 4 out of the last 5 days) that I'd missed out a lot of my things and it all piled up to the point my to-do list had over 10 items that were overdue. I've found that once items are overdue for more than a day for me, I grow numb to them, it's like "well now what do I do first? Stuff that's needed today? Or stuff that was needed yesterday?" Either way I feel overwhelmed and the frustration sets in. Especially when I see my inbox cluttered up with new emails and tasks, I just feel lost as to where to even begin! The only thing I can think of doing is ignoring it and going out.

Which brings me to another issue, my legs are exhausted! Ahah, yikes. I've been standing so much for the last few days that my legs are literally too tired to push me up and walk around. I can feel a certain level of soreness as well creeping up all over my lower body. Heh, ok yesterday's lower-body workout didn't really help in easing the pain either. I just hope I didn't overtrain my muscles.

On a brighter note, I'm very, very motivated to drink a lot of water. Why? Because I'm thirsty. I guess hunger and thirst are 2 things you'll never been "not motviated to do" when you are hungry and thirsty. It's quite interesting to see how your sub-concious/body can push you past your "too tired to care" attitude. Too bad my mind knows how to get lazy voluntarily. I guess I really should learn from it.

Speaking of learning stuff, I learnt a hard lesson recently. I learnt that sometimes, even when you're trying to be as positive as possible, things can still suck. I recently watched the movie I'd been waiting for years and years for -- Terminator Salvation, and I went in, super duper excited, thinking "I don't care, just give me cyborgs, guns, crazy music, awesome-ness!!" and the movie was so bad, even my super positive attitude and excitement was crushed. When the movie ended, I felt so upset because it totally ruined the whole Terminator series of movies. Completely. Not only did the movie not deserve the money I spent on my ticket, it was a waste on a big screen, it made me ashamed to say Terminator 2: Judgement Day was my all-time favorite movie. Well I guess now I realized, no matter what, expect the worst, and when you're expecting the worst, don't assume anything or that things cant get that bad, literally expect the worst. Interesting.

Alright, enjoy your next 10 days, let's see if I can get my butt-kicked into gear to get stuff done!